I need advice from nice women: What should I say that may be helpful or reassuring to my girlfriend?

Sometimes, my girlfriend gets down on herself and says she is so fat. I tell her, ';Oh Honey, you are beautiful! You are just beautiful!';





She gained some weight (80 pounds) when she underwent steroid therapy for an eye ailment 2 years ago. She IS VERY beautiful and she is voluptuous, curvy and DANG!, she makes my heart throb! I just adore her and it makes me sad that she says she is fat. I try to just let her know that she is very desirable and beautiful to me, but it seems like she doesn't hear me. I don't go on about it, but I make it clear that she is beautiful.





What do I SAY?? What do I DO??





We are celibate and we are not going to be intimate until we marry, if that info helps.





Please help me to know what to say?





In advance, I thank you very much!I need advice from nice women: What should I say that may be helpful or reassuring to my girlfriend?
I go through the same thing your g/f does - I know for a fact the my b/f has had women bigger than me %26amp; women smaller than me %26amp; I worry that one day he'll wake up, look at me %26amp; go Man! I need to find someone who looks like Keira Knightley or Jenna Jameson or Pamela Anderson........He tells me all of the time that he thinks I'm beautiful, no matter what size I am. I guess all you can do is to continue to reassure her when she's down on herself, compliment her all of the time, reiterate how lovely she is. When she's ';up';, see exactly what circumstances did that for her %26amp; try to recreate it when she gets upset about her weight. We all want to be perfect for the ones we love %26amp; she's no different. She sees what society has decided is beautiful %26amp; - like me - she doesn't fit that. She has got to learn that with you, it truly is the person you love, as well as the total package. I hope you can get her to see that. Practice often, tell her daily. She also has to accept herself for who she is; until she does that, she won't believe you when you tell her how beautiful, sexy, incredible, lovely etc


she is! Perhaps counselling? Classes on self-image? How about a makeup %26amp; hair makeover? Anything to make her feel good about herself. She's lucky to have found someone like you - I wish you every happiness with one another %26amp; I hope you get through to her!! ( I still have a lot of trouble believing how much my fiancee loves me, that he finds me beautiful, sexy, etc) (( I need to practice what I preach, huh?! ))I need advice from nice women: What should I say that may be helpful or reassuring to my girlfriend?
get her a voucher by a beauty spa, not for a facial or body wraps or anything that would offend her, but for a nice back and foor massage, maybe an indian head massage and aromatherapy bath, pamper her....with that you leave a little note by one of the ladies and tell them to give it to her with a glass of champaghne, in the note you say something like





to the most wonderful, most beautiful woman in my life you deserve the treatment of royalty because you are the princess of my heart, love you.





hope it helps, youre a good man, God bless you both
Well...you sound like an amazing man! She is lucky to have you! The most important thing is to always be honest. If you truly believe she is beautiful, keep saying it. Problem is, she doesn't feel beautiful. But, this is her issue, so --- she will address it when she is ready; whatever that looks like. I do have a few suggestions for you:





1. Reassure her that you love HER, not a number on a scale or a size of clothing.





2. When she talks about gaining weight and/or losing weight, let her know that you love her no matter what her weight. If she loses weight or gains weight your love for her will not increase or decrease.





3. Comment on the media and your opinions of what the media portrays as beautiful. If you truly think that thin women are not attractive, gently comment on that. If you think a plus size model is attractive, say it.





In the end, she will need to feel beautiful for herself, and not for you. The best thing you can do for her is to listen, without judgment. Be consistent in what you do and allow her the space to figure out what is best for her.





I hope this helps. Good Luck!
tell her the truth she is fat
I believe if she is still on steroids she'll stay puffy until she's off them. My sister in law was that way, but now she's off them and the weight is coming off. If you're assuring her that she's beautiful doesn't help, ask her if she'd feel better if she had an exercise partner, and be more active. Do things with her to get her active and maybe she'll feel better about things if she feels she's doing more to help herself. Remind her that her true beauty is inside, not outside.
You are so sweet and your descision to wait is great. Tell her what you just told us. If it's too vulgar you think then just do something else. I have the same problem but not a lot of support. Everyday tell her she is so beautiful and all. If she keeps saying she's fat then tell her you will help her with losing weight. You might think it will hurt her, but it will show that you care. See when you think your fat your depressed and feel bloated and maybe she's sick of it. So if the pep talks don't help, then try to diet with her. You are a great BF. She knows that so don't down yourself either!
keep telling her she is beautiful. never give in and say she's gained weight. that is bad. i ask all the time and comment on how i am fat, which i'm not, but i want to hear him say i'm not and that in his eyes i am the most desirable, the most beautiful, cause pretty is for little girls, and the most wonderful woman he has ever laid eyes on, and that he can't wait to have me for the rest of his life. it's a wonderful thing to hear. but, yeah, your in the clear and she knows it. just a little self-concious sometimes. keep up the good work.
nothing would really really comfort her, coz she can look to the mirror every now and then and see that she has really become overweight, besides whenever she tries to buy something new she will see how her size has grown bigger and bigger... it will never be easy for her... my friend is fat and i know how bad she feels when she goes shopping for example... however, i know that one thing really makes her feel better, i'm not saying feels good, but ';better';.. it is actually when her husband never mentions her weight and always assure her that what he cares for is the inner side of her. on the other hand , you should try to help her diet and lose weight, and support her in this aspect. this is the best you can do for her...
Find other ways to make her feel sexy and beautiful. I'm sure it makes it a little difficult, trying to maintain a celibate lifestyle, but there are other ways. Stare at her from across a room, later informing her that you found yourself staring but you just couldn't help it. Try to take more pictures, in everyday settings, like when you're just sitting around hanging out. Every once in a while pick one out and tell her how beautiful the picture is (I think it would help if the one you pick out showed her whole body). Continue to tell her how beautiful she is, every chance you get. Touch her more. Fall in love with her curves. Feel them, squeeze them, kiss them, hold them (of course without going to far). I know as a bigger woman, when a man likes to feel on my curves, at first it can be a little condescending (mainly if it's from someone I'm not that comfortable with), but then I realize I kind of like it, because it makes me feel like he loves them and can't get enough of them. I hope this helps.